jump through huge exposition scenes with a little hallucinatory action. That’s good, because it helps Vin and co. She runs a bar and can walk into people’s dreams as well as unlock living memories. To learn more, he’s going to have to partner up with a witch and finds the perfect one in Rose Leslie. Along with his new priest buddy Elijah Wood, Vin unlocks a conspiracy that just might involve the resurrection of that old witch queen or something. Unfortunately, Caine drops dead almost instantly and good ol’ Vin knows immediately that black magic is the culprit. Because that’s a super funny thing to do, apparently. Even though he’s partnered up with Michael Caine’s priest, he calls him kid. Diesel is super brilliant because he’s got hundreds of years worth of knowledge and experience behind him. However, if any witch gets out of line, Vin will hunt them down and send them to super-secret witch jail. In this world, witches exist in secret, thanks to ancient deals made between the magic and religious communities. A few centuries later, good ol’ Vin is still up to his witch hunting ways in the current day. He kills an evil witch queen, but is cursed with immortality in the process. Things kick off in medieval times with Diesel sporting an absolutely absurd beard n’ hair combo that’s almost worth the price of admission for sheer absurdity. Clearly a lot of money was spent it’s just a shame that not a lot of care or effort went into making the movie anything more than expensive. The best thing that can really be said about the movie is that it looks expensive. Confusingly written, indifferently performed, and shot in a manner that makes it difficult to even see what’s happening, this thing is an absolute disaster. Yet, even by Vin’s lowball standards, The Last Witch Hunter is an absolutely abysmal attempt to launch a blockbuster franchise. Aside from the accidental idiotic brilliance of the Fast And Furious series, Vin Diesel isn’t exactly the mark of quality in any movie.
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